September 22, 2012
Hey sweetness,
Holy cow, I can’t believe you turn SEVEN today! I’m such a typical mom and have already made
you sit through the retelling of you birth day, which is really not complete
without hearing about the days leading up to it, including all kinds of
dramatic highlights of your labor and delivery.
Which, I may add again, were not easy. But even as you roll your eyes at my
sentimental story, none of us can help but smile as I talk about the first time
I heard you cry, the first words your dad said ( “He looks like my brother!”)
and the first time I held you in my arms.
You were my firstborn, my introduction to motherhood, and you have
shaped me as a person more than almost any other human on this planet.
This last year has been quite a RIDE between the two of
us. Something about our personalities
(maybe we’re too much alike?!?) makes us connect and laugh and share special
jokes and stories one minute, and infuriate each other the next. You can push my buttons and bring out heated
emotions in me that no one else on earth can touch. It’s a special gift. ;) And
I know I can push you over the edge too.
And often. But you also can melt
my heart and bring out the mama bear in me, the part of me that will do
anything for you. If you truly need me,
I will drop anything and bend over backwards to make things right for you.
I’ve felt this recently as you’ve started first grade. It’s been a rough transition for you, on the
heels of another rough—but wonderful—transition this summer: bringing Asher
home and into our family. You have
really stepped up to the plate and have shown that you are an amazing big
brother! You love Asher, protect him,
help him, teach him. But I can see that
as mama’s time and attention has been stretched thin, that has been hard for
you. Sometimes this manifests itself in
you lashing out and talking about how your siblings get all the attention. And sometimes you just quietly show that you
need more attention. You are more intent on spending our one-on-one time
together at night before bedtime, and have been pretty upset about being gone
from home so long now that your school days are longer. At first you were
riding the bus home, but you had tears in your eyes and told me that it just
takes too long after school until you see me again. How could I say no to that?! So now I load up the younger kids and the
wagon and drag them through the sea of parents so we can be waiting at the school
doors when you get out. The smile on
your face as you spot us after searching the crowd is worth all the
effort. I know the longer days are hard
on you, but for us? I think absence
makes the heart grow fonder. You and I
miss each other a lot, and our afternoons are sweeter than they have been all
summer.
One exciting thing that has happened in the last year is
that you learned to read. Your love of
books kind of ebbs and flows, but I feel a major victory when you choose to
read on your own and tell me about an interesting or exciting book you
read. You had a great kindergarten year,
and soaked up all kinds of information about words, science, math, music, writing…it was a
great foundation for you. I also think
your math skills have improved because you are VERY interested in your
allowance: how much you have, how much you need, how much a certain coveted
item costs. I got so sick of the ice
cream trucks coming by our house day and night this summer, but I tell you
what: you quickly were able to add up the cost of certain treats and figure out
if you had enough money to buy them. More
than once you even bought for your brother and sister, which left me glowing
with pride. Other than you know, your obsession with sugary treats.
But I think my favorite thing about you is your humor. Mister, you are hilarious. And witty.
And sarcastic. And silly. You often hear a funny line on a tv show or
movie, then store it up in your head, just to pull it out at the perfect moment
to leave us all in stitches. Your comic timing and delivery are impeccable! (I like to think that is an inherited trait.) You are
willing to laugh at yourself too, which it one of the keys to being funny AND
likeable, not using your humor to mock others.
Your teacher from last year told
me that you are already a natural leader.
She said just by jumping up and excitedly saying “Let’s play tag!” all
the other kids would jump up and want to play tag too. I can see this gift already blossoming in
you, and it excites and scares me. I
pray you will use your charismatic personality to help others, to reach out to
those who are marginalized, to include those who are alone, to set an example
of kindness.
A couple years ago, I fell upon a Scripture verse that I had
read many times before, but suddenly I KNEW beyond a doubt that this was going
to be my life’s prayer for you. I call
it your life verse (of course you may choose your own someday, but this will
always be mine for you.) Whenever I see
it or hear it, my heart quickens and I get tears in my eyes, because it makes
me think of you and the amazing person you are, and the man I want you to
become.
Philippians 1:9-11
“And
this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and
depth of insight, so that you may be able to discern
what is best and may be pure and blameless for the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus
Christ—to the glory and praise of God.”
My sweet son, whatever character God has
given you—the sweet and the fiery—it can all be used for the glory and praise
of God. I’m so blessed to have you in my
life, as we both continue to learn to discern what is best. May we continue to refine each other day
after day! I love you so very much, and
always will. No matter what.
Love always,
7 comments:
Shoooooot. What a beautiful post! We love this kiddo so much! He was the stepping stone for ALL of us. Our first taste of motherhood, too! I can't wait till he's old enough to appreciate my poop stories... HA! Love ya, sweet mama. :)
Shoooooot. What a beautiful post! We love this kiddo so much! He was the stepping stone for ALL of us. Our first taste of motherhood, too! I can't wait till he's old enough to appreciate my poop stories... HA! Love ya, sweet mama. :)
Carson, you gave us our first chance to be JoJo and Bapaw. When you arrived, we knew we would LOVE being grandparents. We've had such a great time over your first seven years! Happy Birthday, CarCar! WE love you like crazy.
JoJo And Bapaw Roy
Stop! You're making me cry!
What a great boy. I wish I could know him. I know I'd love him 'cos I already love his Mama.
Well done, you. God is delighted.
Happy birthday, Carson! We love you so much...and can't believe you're already SEVEN!!!
Happy (day after his) birthday to Carson! Jen- I think the thing I look up to most in you is your desire to truly KNOW your children. It's a given that most parents would want to know their children, but you have such a heart felt desire to understand the way their brains work, what makes them tick, why they respond or react the way they do, etc. You don't just write off behaviors as a phase or get frustrated, you seek to find out the reason behind that and how to work through it. I absolutely love how you were able to understand that Carson was missing his time with you, and that you've put forth the extra work to give him that time. I can only hope that I'll be able to do the same for my children. And your verse for Carson made me tear up (ah pregnancy hormones) because it seems so fitting for Jace. While I think Jace and Asher have a lot in common for their 2 year old behaviors, I think what I'll face with Jace as far as the way his brain works is similar to Carson. Thank you for being such a wonderful example to me!
I thank God that I got to hold you as a newborn baby and have gotten to watch you grow to be a 7 yr old young man. Thank you for your hug the other day. You light up my heart Carson. Love you forever!
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